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As election season heats up, our MPs and party leaders more than ever face the constant scrutiny of a focussed public eye. Of course, never focus too hard–I’ve heard direct eye contact with a politician is how they’ll eat your soul. But with that aside, these next few months mean our politicians will be refining their policies as they get ready for the release of their officials platforms and are carefully coaching their behaviour in the media.

“But you know what? Screw both those things!” Halifax MP Megan Leslie likely jeered as she banged onto her twitter account a response to the aptly monikered Twitter user @BlogWrath–a prolific investigative journalist and critic of NDP social policy. On Twitter, that is; a website that, since its adoption by our public officials, has come to resemble the open-forum-democracy concept invented by our Grecian predecessors of yore and, likely, is as sacred an institution. Never has it been easier for great contemporary minds such as the likes of Britney Spears to wax political in service of all of Twitter’s readers.

Still more articulate that question period transcriptions

Still more articulate than question period transcriptions.
Twitter, @britneyspears

The first shot of this Twitter war-of-wits came from Mr. Wrath in response to a tweet made by Halifax NDP candidate Joanne Hussey, who posted an image of an NDP advertisement that had the title, “Proud to Have a Gay Agenda”. And rightfully so. In the wake of Pride Week in Canada, the NDP released a detailed list of initiatives they plan on implementing to achieve equality for the LGBTQ community in Canada. This includes Bill C-279, which would guarantee equal rights for transgender and gender variant Canadians, Motion M-517, which would revise service records for those discharged from the Canadian Forces on the basis of sexual orientation or gender identity, and hopefully official Canada-wide SangriaFridays.

Screen Shot 2015-07-21 at 2.59.30 PM

What a great way to learn a bit about political policy–perusing the newspaper ads for discount Chinese food!
Twitter, @joanne_hussey

On the surface, this package is evidence enough that the NDP is taking the matter of gay rights seriously. But, Mr. Blog Wrath had a few questions to ask before fully being able to trust that the NDP are on the right side of history.

Blog Wrath's profile picture of the holy trinity

Blog Wrath’s profile picture of the holy trinity.
Twitter, @BlogWrath

Hard hitting questions. Sure, I’m fully supportive of LGBTQ rights, but promoting them in our schools? Maybe our students just don’t have the capacity to learn about a historically oppressed minority.

It is at this point that Megan Leslie, a loose-canon renegade of sorts, stepped in. Peaked by Blog Wraths shake-down of Hussey, Leslie lost herself in the heat of this discerning and relentless probe of the NDP party and let slip the true intentions behind the NDPs ‘gay agenda’.

Screen Shot 2015-07-22 at 12.07.29 PM

The loose-cannon renegade steps in.
Twitter, @MeganLeslieMP

My god, so it’s true. How could we have ever believed that a party in support of LGBTQ equality wasn’t in fact in support of LGBTQ domination. If elected, the NDPs policy of compulsory homosexuality will be the first step of a gay master race’s rise to reign over a far-more-stylish-Orwellian Canada. However, with the NDP leading in the polls, it may be time for us to look at the perks of an imminent gay dystopia.

Our new overlords may not be too hard on the eyes.