15. Conrad Black

He already has experience in British Parliament. He already has a nice-looking mugshot for a security pass.
14. Don Cherry

Now Don can find more old white men to talk over!
CBS Sports
13. Marc Nadon

The whole “Court thing” didn’t work out. Ah, hell, let’s give this a shot.
CBC
12. Ezra Levant

Because we don’t have enough angry partisans
YouTube
11. The Fords

Doug and Ford. A package deal. When one is in a random bar in rural Ontario, the other is sitting in.
aux.tv
10. David Suzuki

He may be unemployed after these CBC cuts.
YouTube
9. Jean Chretien

The legend.
YouTube
8. Andrew Coyne

He has the passion. He is clearly non-partisan, because he hates everyone (except us).
YouTube
7. Justin Bieber

Now Bieber can make the Prime Minister look bad regularly!
National Post
6. George Stroumboulopoulos

He’s in everything already, anyways. He also does very well in feigning interest.
YouTube
5. “Canadian Tire” Guy

The everyman. He fixes all of our problems. Lets get him to clean the senate.
YouTube
4. Steve Murray

If Toronto would be so foolish to not elect him as mayor, Ottawa would be fortunate to have him.
YouTube
3. Celine Dion

The most competent Dion in Canada.
Yellow-Diamond
2. Margaret Wente

The Senate would be fun with someone to cause political shitstorms by saying the most outlandish things.
YouTube
1. Prince Charles

Strengthen ties with our future king. He loves Canada. Canada, fruits, polar bears, and drag queens love him.
YouTube