Kathleen Wynne claims to be Ontario’s Minister of Agriculture, but she doesn’t even know how to ride a tractor.
This morning, Wynne, atop her
throne tractor, announced her plan for farmers and food. However, farmers weren’t interested in her money-talk, they were interested in her reckless tractor-driving practices. More importantly, the other parties in Ontario have seen Wynne’s poor tractor etiquette as a way to make Ontarians realize that if she can’t drive a tractor, she can’t drive Ontario.
Tractor 101 teaches us that sticking 2 people on a 1-seat tractor is a dumb idea. So does common sense. In Ontario, tractors have caused 250 deaths in 15 years. Looks like Wynne is living life on the edge, and she’s getting hit hard for it.
The Ontario Tories have been criticizing Wynne’s indiscretion, saying that she’s “a terrible tractor driver” and setting a bad example. In fact, the Tories have been implying that her driving is just as reckless as her plan for the province.
Though the intention of her visit to rural Ontario was to promote her plan of #Farms4eva, Wynne has inadvertently started Ontario’s greatest scandal: #TractorGate. That’s right, it’s an official #Gate scandal now.
This whole scandal is causing Ontarians to question her competency: If she can’t cultivate our crops, how can she cultivate Ontario’s prosperity? If she can’t drive a tractor, how can she drive Ontario’s growth? If she can’t grow our food, how can she grow the economy?
These are clearly going to become the ballot box questions for the Ontario election on June 12. Tractors are the key to political success, kids.