The True North Times
  • The only thing that Andrew Coyne DOESN'T hate
  • Ineligible for the Supreme Court
  • First to podcast with Wilfrid Laurier
  • Winnipeg? There?
  • For the sophisticated hoser
  • Now with 60 minute hours!
  • Yet to be castrated by Margaret Wente
  • Exporting Beaver Hides to the Metropol since 1608
  • It's Dynamite!
  • Peter Mansbridge’s bathroom reading material

Welcome to the True North Times’ interpretation of 24/SEVEN: a recap of the past week in the life of the Prime Minister of Canada, and more.

 

 

This week, Prime Minister Stephen Harper had his hands full with special events, celebrations, and various movements he had to partake in.  In no particular order—because order is for quitters—here are the fun-filled events that featured Harper.

Our PM met with NATO’s supreme commander general, Philip Breedlove, about the situation in Ukraine, which happens to be a common theme within 24SEVEN.  Evidently, much is needed to be done in the country. This is why they’ve talked about it for over nine weeks. It’s a process.

Oh, look! Tougher sanctions on Russia! Our PM believes this should do the trick. By publicising the fact that he has been discussing the situation with other leaders, committing Canadian troops to do practice missions with NATO in Poland, and implementing these tougher sanctions, Russia will surely cave. They’re probably shaking in their boots!

Harper also showed up in Montreal to announce funding for important research on Alzheimer’s and autism. The government committed to match donations dollar-for-dollar to the project. Science may not be a primary focus for the Harper government, or a secondary focus, or a tertiary concern for that matter, but, sometimes, it’s important.

Next, we see our PM sacrificing his perfectly tufted hair for safety, rocking the white hardhat while in a college. He was there announcing scholarships for those in the school.

Injured soldiers from Afghanistan were honoured as well this week, which was great to see. It served as a reminder that there is help out there for injured and sick war veterans who need it. Oh, and it was sponsored by Canadian Tire.

Stephen Harper hung out with some Sikhs for their national holiday, Vaisakhi. We hear our leader speak eloquently, once again, and, even though he seemed to struggle with pronunciation a bit, he picked it right back up again with big words and a smooth voice.

Laureen Harper met with entrepreneurs regarding the protection of youth online. If you read my latest post, you will discover that Stephen Harper is still quite young. This means Laureen is looking out for her husband. Sounds like she’s already taken initiatives to ensure that Stephen doesn’t read the True North Times.

Then, the Prime Minister met with Israeli ambassador, Rafi Barak, where he was presented a photo album containing pictures from his trip to Israel.

Switching back to the Sikhs, we see them dance to Pharrell’s song “Happy.” That song seems to have a contagious vibe to it that is transferrable to all religions and languages.

Finally, our Prime Minister proves that he can do it all, after reading a radio ad in one take. He then shares an anecdotal story about radio voices. A specific radio host would slip into the “radio voice,” and those around him had to remind him to stop doing it. It’s okay when our PM does it, though.

 

Here’s what they missed:

A great piece from Metro talks about those paid internships and scholarships announced by our PM this week: “[It’s] the equivalent of putting a Band-Aid on a gaping puncture wound.”

Other than that, not much in the world of Stephen Harper. I’m shocked.

Until next week on 24/SEVEN!