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Newfies are known for living a simple life on the big rock, beatin’ the pat by boatin’, drinkin’, and fishin’. But let the government take away their shrimp, and you’ve got a full-on scandal. Shockin’ that is, shockin’!

The Department of Fisheries and Oceans was up to some so-called ‘skulduggery’ by cutting the shrimp quota in Newfoundland by 10,000 tonnes. How much fish can a Newfie fisher fish if the fisheries’ face fishy fish cuts? Not quite as much as they’d like. Residents are appalled by the government, and the kicker is that the smaller inshore fisheries are to take on 90% of the cuts.  As Earle McCurdy, president of the Fish, Food and Allied Workers union, says, it’s unfair to leave inshore fishermen out like “chopped liver”. If you’re not a fisherman, here’s the gist: the government is a meanie because they’re favouring the other group of fishermen and destroying the lives of happy Newfies. How shellfish of them!

Newfies know everything there was to know about the shrimpin' business

Newfies know everything there was to know about the shrimpin’ business | Gulf Shrimp Tales

The government clearly doesn’t appreciate shrimp. As the classic quote goes, “shrimp is the fruit of the sea. You can barbecue it, boil it, broil it, bake it, sauté it. Dey’s, uh, shrimp-kabobs, shrimp creole, shrimp gumbo. Pan fried, deep fried, stir-fried. There’s pineapple shrimp, lemon shrimp, coconut shrimp, pepper shrimp, shrimp soup, shrimp stew, shrimp salad, shrimp and potatoes, shrimp burger, shrimp sandwich.” Yes, b’y. Them Newfies like their shrimp. That’s why they’re still riled up, even though this cut happened almost a month ago. It’s a big deal, and some say it’s even worse than the dreaded cod moratorium!

Yes b’y! They’re protesting, picketing, and passive-aggressively tweeting about the beloved crustaceans. What is Newfoundland without shrimp? This cut leaves a gaping hole not only in the fish-crazy economy, but in the hearts and souls of every self-respecting Newfie.

Newfoundlanders have got their nerves drove, and they’re coming together to fight the good fight to #SaveOurShrimp. Sure, they’re talking about the economy and other stuff too, but most of the attention goes to the cute (and slightly creepy) little shrimps. The NL government is forming an all-party committee, and next week, MP Ryan Cleary will bring up the issue in the House of Commons Fisheries Committee. Grab your fisher friends and seafood-lovers and help convince Fisheries Minister Gail Shea that fish are people too! Remember, fish are friends, not food. You get the point: shrimp are important.

Shea has been hush-hush on the subject thus far, declining to comment on the decision. How many Newfies does it take to get an explanation from a minister? We don’t know, but we send our regards to the Newfie fishermen and pray that they can get back to their happy little bubble of obscure half-hour time zones and shrimple, laid-back lifestyles ASAP.


#SaveOurShrimpWikimedia Commons

#SaveOurShrimp, even though they’re pretty creepy
Wikimedia Commons