The True North Times
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Tim Hudak, the leader of the Progressive Conservative Party running in the Ontario election, has promised to create one million jobs as part of his platform. One million isn’t a particularly big number. To put it in perspective, there are more than 13 million people in Ontario, and way more than a million cells in the tip of your little finger. These startling numbers offer some explanation as to why Tim Hudak is already backing away from his “Million Jobs Plan”. But, in this case, backing away doesn’t mean changing the plan, it means retreating so as to start the race from behind the starting line.

 

 

Today, Ontario’s second most popular Timmy H. (after Hortons) announced that, should Ontarians elect him Premier, he will cut 100 000 public sector jobs. So what about the Million Jobs Plan? It took a lot of number crunching, but just before the calculator burst into flames it revealed these job cuts would leave Hudak responsible for creating 1 100 000 jobs. That’s ambitious. While other leaders are sleep talking about the billions of dollars they would need for infrastructure projects, pensions, healthcare, and debts, Hudak is living on the cutting edge. Playing a diluted version of Austin Powers’ nemesis, Dr. Evil, he is shifting the focus of this election from the things Ontarians don’t want (billions of dollars for services and other stuff) to the things they do want (1 million jobs). Logically, it follows that the folks Hudak plans to fire are either Manitoban or Quebecer imposters, or outliers. The picture of an action man, he has every reason to brag about his plan. Compared to Andrea Horwath, who, flail as she might, stands virtually no chance of winning this election, and Kathleen Wynne, who has been working terribly hard to maintain her tenuous grip on power, Mr. Hudak makes things look easy. He’s not only going to deliver his Million Jobs Plan, he’s going to do it while simultaneously cutting jobs. There are two words in the English language that adequately describe Mr. Hudak in this situation: hero, and idiot. He’s hoping for the former, but forgetting that most Ontarians would describe almost anyone in Queen’s Park with the latter. It’s a risky bet, but hey, maybe danger is his middle name.