The True North Times
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68 per cent of Canadians think Stephen Harper is dishonest (the other 32 per cent surely know he’s dishonest, but that’s beside the point).  Maybe it’s because he spent public money to promote a jobs program that didn’t exist.  Maybe it’s because his government’s sole focus is promoting an economic recovery program that isn’t real.  In any case, spring is in the air, cold and flu season is ending, and Canadians can finally breathe again.  With clear noses, they can catch a fresh whiff of bullshit.  Polls show they want a new PM, and the good news is that some of them can have one.  Enter Pauline Marois.

P.M. by name, Marois is making a great case for PM by title.  Heck, she already has it in Quebec.  She also has the personality to replace Chairman Harper.  She refuses to participate in press events and she wants a majority.  Also, like the Chairman, she wants to redraw the map to her benefit.

Perhaps that last comparison is unfair.  While our Dear Leader merely redrew riding boundaries to redistribute the vote in his favour, Marois suggests a complete redrawing of Canada.  You’re probably thinking “Boooooooooring!  We’ve been there and done that back when Baywatch was still a thing.”  While it’s true that Canada has had referendums before, it is important to understand that Marois is not proposing a simple referendum.

P.M. wants a sovereign Quebec with borders that function like the EU model.  So, in North American terms: no borders.  Big change, right?  No, not really.  Quebecers could still see “the Rockies out West and go to Prince Edward Island,” so there is no reason to panic.  To keep financial markets from collapsing, Quebec will still use the Canadian dollar, with a permanent seat on the Bank of Canada. Thank God for Pauline Marois, protector of the Quebec citizen’s right to passports, access to Alberta’s oil and mountains, and chance to experience P.E.I.’s charm and red dirt.  As for the border changes, the rest of Canada has to suck it up and deal with it.  This sounds outrageous, so let’s put it in context. At the federal level, Emperor Harper is trying to stop Canadians from voting.  In Quebec, Pauline Marois is trying to make sure sovereign Quebecers can still travel.  Totally harmless.

Or is there more to it?  Some allege that Marois’ thick accent is hiding institutionalized corruption and racism in la belle province.  Others, like Quebec Liberal leader Philippe Couillard, say that focusing on separatism hurts Quebec.  Evidently, there is a diversity of opinions on how Quebec should approach the future.  Let’s add one more opinion to the mix.

Dearest voters of Quebec, heed this advice.  From one Canadian to another (at least for the time being), think carefully about what you are about to do.  You elected Pauline Marois to replace Charest’s Liberals.  You gave Marois a minority government to show the Liberals that they had screwed up, but that you weren’t ready to throw the province to the dogs quite yet.  Remember what happened in Canada in 2006?  We turfed the Paul Martin Liberals to send them a message.  We replaced them with El Dictator and his band of maniacs, but we only gave them a minority so that they couldn’t destroy our country.  A few years later, in 2011, we upgraded them to a majority and, well…it’s pretty much what we expected.  Do you want the same thing to happen to your province?  Polls suggest that Marois is in majority territory, so proceed cautiously.  Some politicians are meant to lead minority governments.  For your own sakes, count Pauline Marois among them.